


What do you mean this isn't canon?

by luminescentGourd



Series: Minigame Joke hc Series [1]
Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Dangan Ronpa: Trigger Happy Havoc
Genre: Swearing, kyoko can beatbox, vague descriptions of death, vague shitposting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-05
Updated: 2020-01-05
Packaged: 2021-02-27 06:15:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,033
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22122442
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/luminescentGourd/pseuds/luminescentGourd
Summary: Its the first trial and shit's going down.(based on several joke hcs)
Relationships: naegiri if you squint real hard
Series: Minigame Joke hc Series [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1592392
Comments: 8
Kudos: 48





	What do you mean this isn't canon?

Maizono Sayaka was dead, as well as Enoshima Junko. The tragic deaths of their classmates had weighed on the shoulders of the remaining 13 students as they entered the elevator and persisted through their time in the courtroom. Minutes into the class trial, an event that, as many students were unfamiliar with how due process of law works, no one knew how to progress it. Well, no one except for two kids. It was kinda like the group discussions a literary teacher might make their students participate in, albeit with more bloodshed, and the fear of an absurd and incredibly painful death looming over their heads. 

Oddly but luckily enough for the majority of students, the local average-joe type Naegi Makoto, as well as the mysterious lone-wolf Kirigiri Kyoko turned out to be the unexpected MVP’s of the pseudo-trial. 

While Kyoko was able to decipher each clue with ease, she seemed to feel the need to convince at least one person of a piece of evidence before sharing it. She had found that the best way to do that was to not outright *tell* them what she had found, but to gently *guide* them to the answers. The one she deemed fit for the job was none other than the previously mentioned Makoto, who would disappear into his own mind for several minutes every time he was posed a question. His answers, however, would oftentimes be exactly the point Kyoko was trying to prove, had she been the asker in the first place or not. 

The two had carried their class through the trial easily, even with the time it took Kyoko to be cryptic and Makoto to be spacey. It was because of their efforts that they had finally managed to uncover the culprit. Kuwata Leon, whose shirt had been found in the incinerator and whose name was spotted behind the body by Kyoko, who had been the only one who bothered to look at the crime scene for longer than a few seconds.

In hindsight, this one was a little obvious.

15 excruciating minutes ago, Kyoko had suggested Makoto sum up Leon’s crime. Of course, the boy accepted. He now stands at his podium, coloring with pens and markers nobody knew he had on his person. His eyes stayed focused on his craft project, the room silent as he worked. At first, Leon had loudly protested his association with the crime as this went on, but he was quickly shut up by Celeste's hand and made very aware of what was happening. After those 15 minutes had passed, Makoto continues working diligently as Byakuya audibly groans.

“Are you all *really* risking your lives waiting on this buffoon to be finished scribbling?” Byakuya snaps, breaking the silence.

“Actually, this is exactly the kind of tension that keeps people invested!” Monokuma beams from his throne. “Buuuuuut keep this up much longer and I’m gonna start getting bored.”

“Almost…” mumbles the buffoon in question. “There!” He looks up at his classmates and shares what he’s done. It was a 10 page fully colored manga style summary of the crime complete with onomatopoeia littering each panel. 

“Here’s what happened--”

“You did that in 15 minutes!?” Hifumi blurts out clearly both impressed and a little jealous. "Something like this would have taken me several days to complete if I was pacing myself properly..." 

“Huh, guess I did." Makoto dismissed the doujin author's comment. "Anyway last night, the killer…” He continues on, making little sound effects when appropriate. His narrative performance captivates his audience and no one has the heart to interrupt him again. Even Leon, who is there framed as the killer, was silent. He would have protested, but he has to admit, this is kinda bitchin’.

He finishes his dramatic retelling of a crime that, despite the fact that he had never witnessed he had gotten every detail correct, by facing the accused. “Isn’t that right… Leon!?” he yells, startling the aspiring rockstar. 

“Well, do you have any objections?” Kyoko asks. 

“Do I object? *Do I Object*!? Of course I do! I object I object I object!!” Angered screams fill the courtroom. He won’t have another second of this slander. He is going to leave this school. “I had nothing to do with this, the only proof you have is a goddamn crayon drawing! This is stupid! You’re stupid!” He carries on, his ravings devolving into petty insults, but mostly just repeatedly calling them stupid. 

“Kyoko, could you give me a beat,” Makoto says, foreign intensity in his voice. She obliges, failing to question the bizarre request, dropping probably the sickest beatboxing anyone in the courtroom had heard. Makoto picks up one of his markers and brings it towards his mouth. With sound of Kyoko’s secret beatboxing talent, he begins the Bullet Time Battle. 

Makoto spits his first verse, and Leon’s rambling starts to find rhythm. He takes his turn surprisingly well. The two continue roasting each other to the beat of Kyoko’s vocal percussion. The audience begins to rally at the two’s rhymes once they recover from the shock the impromptu rap battle had caused. Celeste swiftly sets up a betting service, from which she will ultimately win all of the MonoCoins wagered. After a particularly hard-hitting line from Makoto, Kyoko picks up the pace. Tension grows between the two before Leon stops in his tracks, the clear loser. Makoto seizes his opportunity and gives one last verse; the final nail in the coffin so to speak, highlighting exactly what was needed to definitively prove that Leon was the culprit. 

…

The execution has concluded. Kuwata Leon is dead. His motive? He had no choice. Sayaka had attacked him first. He claimed self defense. Except he really did have a choice. He could have stopped what he was doing at any time. But he saw his chance and he took it. He could have gotten away with it too, had he only seen Sayaka’s dying message. 

Days after the class trial, people would still be coming up to Makoto about his sudden artistic and rapping skills. The thing is? He would find that he is only able to recreate such results during the class trial.

**Author's Note:**

> thank you so much to my friend static who helped edit
> 
> I may continue this if I find the time and/or inspiration ówò


End file.
